Saturday, February 26, 2011
So SickSometimes, you put in an effort to do something, for someone and at the end of the day, some people just don't realise it, they freaking take it for granted. So, I really quit doing all these anymore. Being nice is a good thing but sometimes you've got to stand for your own ground. Especially when people freaking take everything for granted when they don't even know what's going on.
Been too slow to realise this point. I'm just so freaking tired of all these. & no i'm not on some kind of emotional roller coaster ride. Just that, judging from many things that have become increasingly often and more obvious, I just don't wanna give a damn anymore. Give the attitude, be unhappy, see if i care.
It's becoming kinda hard to show my true emotions. As far as I can remember, I can only recall 2 friends who have heard me cry over the phone or have saw me cry because I was really sad during a session meant for ranting in the last two years or so. More often than not, ranting sessions for me turn out to be more of laughing sessions, somehow or either i just hold it in as much I want to let it out. I have my bad days in school but somehow, more often than not I kinda managed to laugh it off ,maybe because of the jokers I have around, maybe I just can't seem to express what I actually feel inside. Look, when I'm really tired my friends say I talk utter nonsense and say I look like I'm drunk. Irony huh, tired yet so high?
But sometimes, you don't want to act like you're all that tough anymore.
It was me and you against the world @ 12:48 PM
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Exasperating
God, I find myself coming to the same place to rant increasingly often these days. I don't exactly know why either. Maybe there's just too many things happening at the same time I just need a space to breathe. Yet I can't exactly form up proper paragraphs or even sentences to describe how I am feeling currently.
Recently, I've been getting sudden throbbing headaches and they often last through the day or so and it's quite annoying and disturbing. Must be the stress. Experienced ones told me to pace myself. For myself and not others, indeed.
I kinda miss the slow pace life in Australia when people actually have the time to sit on the vast pieces of grasspatch outside their homes to simply, stargaze? Well, we can't do that here. Firstly, they have probably a million of stars in the night sky for stargazing and we have....only a pathetic few. Secondly, we don't have vast pieces of grasspatches to even walk on much less lie on. I miss the beautiful beaches they have to offer there too. Clear blue waters, nice soft sand.... Gah, I just have a soft spot for beaches because I think they kinda give you a calming effect, like times slows down when you simply sit by the beach and watch the waves slowly crashing by, not to mention they're simply beautiful too.
The life we have here is simply too fast, way too fast.
It was me and you against the world @ 9:06 PM
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Unbeautiful
"There comes a time in life when you have to let go of all the pointless drama & the people who create it, & surround yourself with people who make you laugh so hard that you forget the bad and focus soley on the good. After all, life is too short to be anything but happy."
It's really sad and I mean really really sad when people start doubting things and people they always thought to be unquestionable. I thought having to doubt something constantly would be a tiring process to go through, like you live your life being suspicious of every single thing when life's suppose to be quite simple. Why the hassle of doing such a thing? So most of the time, I trust easily. Boy, I was wrong.
I've never really encountered such a thing before and honestly I don't know how to react so I'd rather not react to anything at all. World peace.
Some other things make me even sadder. It's disappointing when the people who should have known me the best are making me worry over for even the simplest things. The mutual understanding, where has it gone to?
Can't things stay simple?
It was me and you against the world @ 12:05 PM
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Cause DJ got us falling in love again 
I think going to school has always been about meeting new people and how somehow, everyone comes together and be one big happy family. Well, kinda. Not that I like the initial awkward process that we have to go through first before becoming good friends but I must admit that in the past 12 years of my schooling life, I've met a a great bunch of people who eventually became an important part of my life. Some managed to stay on and unfortunately ( whatever the reason may be) some did not. & I guess, there are certain major reasons to why some of them really remained close to my heart.
Life in school nowadays have been really simple. Well, yes it's quite stressful too at certain points but somehow the whole stress 'thing' has been neutralised by the many friends who are around. There's like YT who frequently cracks me up, makes me laugh so hard whenever she starts talking, seriously. It's like another Pascalle, but worse. Talking about Pas, I miss her! Okay back on track, then there's like Val, who I just seemingly love to annoy. It drives her mad but I can't help it, I need to relieve stress haha! Then there's Eugene, who's damn annoying but funny at the same time. There's Kwan, whose funny in her own way, Pec, Beat, SH, SL, CT... yeah, our happy family, sort of.
But on the other hand, I really miss my J3 friends ( the graduated J2s) . Mayern used to say, I hang a lot on the past, like 'old' friends. It's true! In year one, relied a lot on Homies but not S12, in year 2, I relied on both Homies and S12. I guess friendships do get better with time, just like wine! Haha! The longer, the better. Sometimes I really wished they were all still in school for me to rant at, all of them felt like family to me honestly.
Finally, I have a picture of the 4 of us together.
& just recently, B just reminded me what I should be doing instead of the other things. Timely. Need to keep reading that message to remind myself. Indeed, close friends keep me sane enough.
Not forgetting yes, I miss Homies too! How can I ever miss them out? Twinnie, Annie...my frequent rants go to them from Sec 3 up till now. =X
And weird enough, I kinda miss the ' feel' of 2009, year 1 though it was a terrible year. Guess even in the midst of the bad times, there were good times that I still kinda liked.
Sometimes I've got this feeling that no one truly understands me anymore. Somehow. Maybe, it could be the stress. Or maybe, everyone's just caught up with their own life. It's hard to catch a breather. & I know, I've got to be stronger for myself because only I can make myself pull through this. There are many nitty gritty things that I have to resolve by myself because only then can I be truly happy.
Dear pent-up frustration,
May you disappear soon. I need some room to breathe and it doesn't help that you are making things harder than it already is.
Sincerely,
Cheryl
Life could be tough and it's hard to face each day with a smile, but I'll try my best to because they say, life's too short to be anything but happy right?
It was me and you against the world @ 8:12 PM
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
I Quit.
It's been a mind boggling few days. Well not to mention kinda frustrating too. It's hard to concentrate, really. Totally not helping the situation, keeps adding more stress. Yeah, so I quit doing this.
Not the first time anyway.
It was me and you against the world @ 6:36 PM
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Turn It Off
Too many things to do, too little time. Feel as if I'm gonna drown in the pile of work I've got to do. Kinda tired, kinda sick of everything and wow, look where we're at only- February.
All my life i've been good but now thinking oh what the hell.
It was me and you against the world @ 10:43 AM
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Against All OddsSigh, I'm so confused right now. So many thoughts running through me and I don't exactly know who to turn to right now. :(
It was me and you against the world @ 9:04 PM
