♥ What that doesn't kill you makes you stronger

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I have no idea why I feel so relaxed right now when so many times at school today I was literally on the verge of pulling out all my hair. Stress much.

Actually I think stress is currently already an understatement.

Today, besides the stress and all I still managed to keep myself pretty high ( surprisingly ). After school I was happily talking with a bunch of friends at the cafe, talking about how saturated we all are already. & then I was saying,

" If only we have 4 brains, it'll be so perfect right? One for each subject...better storage."
Then I got more excited as I continued (HAHA)

" Oh, then like say if the day of the chem paper, i'll just bring my maths and chem brains into the hall to do the paper...awesome right?! and if it's Econs paper, I'll just bring my 'humanities' brain on that day...and..."

Until my friends laughed and went,

"Yah okay cheryl, stop stop. You know that ain't gonna happen."
* SULK*

But really, my brain is hurting already. INFORMATION OVERLOAD.
Sigh. Although I'm really scared right now of everything that's about to happen, I should just keep the faith yea?

Ain't gonna give up now.
& quitting's out of the question.
Keep the faith, keeping my faith.

Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe with no air

Today, I feel so blessed.

Woke up to an sms from a close friend who was worried about me after reading my recent posts. Broke down when I saw the encouraging messages sent too. Ahh...tough period makes one emotional. (: AWW, I love you!(: Thank you for taking time to notice and also to find out more about my current situation! I think you know who you are!!

Then, another unexpected sms came from another friend , apologising for not being able to talk much to me recently. I really felt super touched! It wasn't his fault, really. And I never expected him to even apologise for such stuffs. Everyone was busy so it was kinda inevitable. Besides, he had his own problems to face. You rock babe! Thanks for the encouragement too, totally needed it!

Then came those adorable ones who would reply to my tweets.
I posted recently,' no air, no air' in which they reply, ' I'll be your air <3>

Really...I think I could almost melt and vaporize into thin air after reading all these from them. Got this from Tiffany's blog,

"Friendship isn't about whom you've know the longest. It's about who came, and never left your side , ♥"

How true.
Really thankful to those friends who have stuck by me when I needed them,thankful that they didn't leave when I needed them, thankful that they're just right where I needed them to be.

THANK YOU SO MUCH, IT MEANT A LOT.

It's been so stressful.
I need a stressball of some sort to squeeze before I explode.

How do you salvage something that seems impossible to salvage?



no air, no air.

No matter how I fight it

I feel so suffocated.
Now that we're all on different starting points and ending at different points as well, I feel so alone all of a sudden.

It's damn tiring acting like you're not scared of everything that's coming your way, I can't even begin to describe to you the chain of thoughts and bad memories I have if anything were to happen...

* takes a freaking deep breadth*

Okay,I feel a little braver now.
Got to be!

She said, you don't know me and you don't wear my chains

Been feeling super crappy in the past two days ago or so. It's really a different kind of stress that I've never experienced before. I actually woke up on thursday morning, dreading to go to school. Like seriously, dreaded it to the max. Something which I haven't felt in a long long time. I mean yeah school suck and everything, but the feeling hasn't been so strong since I don't know when. I actually contemplated to tell my mum I was feeling sick and that I needed MC. That bad.

Tough period.

You know, sometimes I really hate people comparing. I hate it when people go, ' Oh...at least you've got (so and so...this and that...) while I've got ..." But it's human nature to compare isn't it? Everyone's plight and situations are different, quit comparing. Sometimes we forget the feelings of the other party. At that very moment, you may think that your life sucks but hey, who knew the other party's life is just as screwed as yours and maybe, even worse? Who are we to judge the opposite party's situation and how he or she should feel perhaps luckier than you just because you deem the situation he or she is in to be pretty insignificant compared to yours. The seriousness of a matter depends on how one perceives it to be, so before we start comparing our plight with another person the next time,maybe we should at least try to understand what the opposite party is going through before passing any comments.

The recent motivational talk came at a right time. It's like such a coincidence and it really did make some sense. A lot actually. Put in your best no matter how hopeless you feel about a situation because you wouldn't know what miracle may happen (:

You are your own motivation.
Don't give up everybody, no matter how tough things may get cause tough times do not last but tough people do! (:

I sound so optimistic right?
Something's WRONG with me, haha.
Seriously!

Pretty optimistic for a pessimist





Recently, there's been far too much negative energy going around and it's really quite demoralising and frustrating to hear at times. Hearing the people around me on the verge of giving up on themselves is sad, very sad. & I try as hard as I can to motivate them and well, myself too but I keep hearing the same old things.


Why so little faith?
Why so little confidence?



At this point of time, with each passing minute and day, the stress is mounting on each and every individual. It's inevitable to fear of what lies ahead in the very near future. Who's not afraid? I'm sure everyone is. The amount of fear in me is like piling up slowly but surely and it's almost killing me, that I won't deny as well.



But in the midst of all these fears that we have, one shouldn't give up, no?At least, I thought so. Failing is when you stop trying, no? So keep trying no matter how tough it gets. Instead of letting all these fears consume you by the day, do something about it, stop the talking and start working and not just sit there and let fear consume you bit by bit. It's not going to be easy, that I know too. But i'm trying. Giving up on yourself certainly won't make you feel better, it's self-degrading. It's like, giving up a could-be bright future ahead of you for literally, nothing.




This is as optimistic as I can get. During this extremely tough time, it gets even tougher when you hear the people around you give up hope, it feels like as if I should give up hope too. But no, I know I shouldn't. I've got far too many people to account to and well, myself to account for. So, I don't know how but I know I've got to give it my best shot, it's make it or break it.




I feel like breaking down but no, not at this time.
I'm much stronger than this.
I hope my friends will be too.


When there's no one to push you, the only person you've got left is just yourself.

YAY FIONA UPLOADED THE PHOTOS!


I noticed that this year, I've been experimenting a lot with my fringe and most of the time, the hairdresser would screw it up. Like seen in the above photo. On the brighter side, my hair is BROWN. Annie should be quite jealous (:

4 years and counting!(:

I remember how I first interacted with Annie in Sec 3. It was super awkward but I remember asking her after assembly whether English lesson was next. Then we both walked back to the classroom together, like in this awkward silence. & Fiona? Knew her from higher chinese classes back in sec 1 and 2 but never really talked to her. Apparently she said she was scared of me and my whole sec 2 higher chinese gang for I don't know what reason. She said we looked intimidating -.- and then in Sec 3, she said she was forced to sit with me in class. Ass! Say until like very torturous to sit next to me like that! In the end, she still ENJOYED my presence luh.

(: Actually, sometimes I wonder how I remember all the knitty gritty details of the past. Can be good, can be bad too.

Not much of a difference whether she closes and opens her eye, cause her eyes are just like slits!So small!But cute luh. (:

Don't wanna pose for Fiona!

Darling Bao! (:

School reopens tomorrow.
Sigh. Sigh. Sigh. Sigh
If only ' my brain doesn't work on mondays' is an accepted excuse to skip school on Mondays, how nice right?

Together at the top

Runaway

I just wanna scream and lose control
Throw my hands up and let it go
Forget about everything and runaway, yeah.

Hold on, hold tight


Hello, I guess today is a relatively good day.

Not because anything nice happened to me but rather I'm glad that two close friends of mine are feeling better than they were yesterday. I was quite sad when I read something left somewhere and I didn't know whether to comment on it because it was quite a sensitive matter.Really wanted to find something to cheer this person up, but I'm really quite bad at words at the same time. Same went for my other friend! So, I just kept everything really short. Sigh, useless me.


Been really stressed recently.
My brain hurts.
But glad to say today was rather productive.

"Next time when you're very stress next time must call me okay? You can't face this alone. You'll just die of stress. Really!"
"But you'll be so bored..."
"It's okay! I'll just watch you. Anyway I can read a book or something while you do your own stuff, I've got a lot of reading to catch up on!"

(: Such nice people that surround me. I must be grateful.


I think that the only reason people hold onto memories so tight is because memories are the only things that don’t change when everybody else does.

# Make You Smile

# Cause no one wants to do it on their own and everyone wants to know they're not alone





Began the day feeling like P. Diddy...not. That is, assuming he felt great when he woke up. I felt like crap. A lot of things were caught up in my mind.One of those days, yet again. Some things just won't go away no matter what, eh?





But then again, did I mention three people made my day today? * Insert smiley face*
Yeah, totally awesome.



Something I learnt from bowling today. I was determined to not let someone own my ass in bowling and the same went for that someone. ( name of person shan't be named to protect the person's reputation, cause he totally got OWNED. Okay, kidding. He did put up a really good fight lah! And anyway, it's just a game!) Focus. Focus is what we all need.



First game 90-84
Second game 122-112 (4 consecutive spares, 1 strike and then spare again yo!)
Such studying and chillax sessions, I like (:


What will I ever do without them?


Fast forward to a year later, I still feel the same.

nothing much, just 5 words.

I MISS THEM, SO MUCH.

for those days we felt like a mistake.

One step at a time

Picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor

You know, it's just the way it goes.

Sometimes you've just got to take a leap of faith and believe.

You know like how sometimes you receive a hard knock, you fall and then you try to get up again? Maybe the beginning would be tough, but so long if you try there's still a glimmer of hope.

& it's all about the waiting.

It's gonna happen and supposed to happen
That we find the reasons why, one step at a time.